1. (Source: marikorn, via h0t-whiskey-eyes)

     
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  3. pissedachios:

    pissedachios:

    What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?

    oh sheet

    (via queenvictoria4)

     
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  9. subjectnumber32:

outerlabia:

fpti:

earlygr4ves:

i walked into health and screamed and the teacher goes “you’re the 7th person today. they’re cpr dummies.”

jesus christ

they’re calling to mother for food

F  E  E  D

    subjectnumber32:

    outerlabia:

    fpti:

    earlygr4ves:

    i walked into health and screamed and the teacher goes “you’re the 7th person today. they’re cpr dummies.”

    jesus christ

    they’re calling to mother for food

    F  E  E  D

    (via perks-of-being-chinese)

     
  10. witchomo:

    lordemusic:

    hate:

    im only 17 and ive already had like 3 mid-life crises

    lol me

    ok lorde you’ve also been nominated for nearly 3 grammys at the age of 17

    (via daidarabocchi)

     
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  13. elfauno:

Finally, some good advice from Cosmo

    elfauno:

    Finally, some good advice from Cosmo

    (via actuallyali)

     
  14. nishlo:

    tukut:

    ur mom hands u a glass of orange juice. u take a sip. its not orange juice. its stirred egg yolks. u spit them all out. u ask ur mom why. she turns around. its not ur mom. its me. ur mom is gone. im ur mother now

    these old spice commercials have been getting really crazy lately 

    (via kayleefabulous)

     
  15. suffocateing:

    *walks out of exam*

    well i was successfully able to bullshit every answer on the test so i think i did okay

    (Source: devoures, via poopstump)

     

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